Author Abbey

I am a simple desert dwelling lesbian with a penchant for complaining on the internet. My special skill is falling asleep anywhere, at any time. My favorite fruit is persimmons but I'm too impatient to keep them in my house. My gayest secret is: I spent $80 plus tax and interest on a Tegan and Sara hoodie once.

Lez Review: Love Lies Bleeding

Sexy, sweaty, suspenseful. I had the pleasure of seeing Love Lies Bleeding in a theater full of gay people not once, but twice in the past month. All I knew about the movie going in was that Kristen Stewart was… Continue Reading →

Exploring Voluntary Celibacy as a Previously Self-Proclaimed Slut

After my last relationship ended in January, I decided to take a break from dating and casual sex. Though the break from dating only lasted four months, that is a long time for me, a serial dater and (previously) self… Continue Reading →

Take Me Down to Orgy Town!

Two years ago, I never thought I’d be the type of person to go to an orgy. Hell, I never thought I’d be the type of person to go to an orgy until I was physically at the orgy. I… Continue Reading →

Bottoms Drafted as Top Shortage Rages On

A dense fog settles over the quiet streets of Portland, OR on a dreary fall morning. Here we meet Dani, a local lesbian and Tinder veteran. Everything about her screams bottom: the vastly oversized flannel, the quirky ankle tattoo, the… Continue Reading →

Walking with a Ghost(er)

Lesbians love online dating. Considering the dwindling number of physical lesbian spaces, it’s not like we can consistently find each other out in the wild. It’s also much easier to curate our dating experiences by only swiping on those who… Continue Reading →

The Magic of Actualize

Due to COVID, Actualize was cancelled in 2020. After a year of anticipation, the event kicked off at the tail end of August 2021. And boy, was it worth the wait! Actualize is an intentional lesbian gathering that (COVID aside)… Continue Reading →

A Life Outside Myself

I can’t remember how old I was when I first started feeling like my body wasn’t home to me. Perhaps it was before puberty, when boys started lifting my skirt for a laugh, or when men stopped their cars to… Continue Reading →

Butch4Butch

An older lesbian I used to look up to once told me the story of her first experiences with dating after coming out. She said “I was a pretty girl, but I kept attracting ugly girls. So I had to… Continue Reading →

Robbery Victims Still Expecting Threesome

From their positions tied back-to-back on dining room chairs (the only furniture left in the house), Chase and Jessica Mansfield express excitement for their upcoming threesome. “God, this is so kinky. Isn’t this kinky, babe?”  Chase wiggles in anticipation against… Continue Reading →

Quarantine Mullets Gain Sentience, Demand Rights

CHICAGO, IL — It has been almost a year since Marcie Monroe, 23, has gotten a haircut. Due to the COVID-related quarantine, her long hair tickles her shoulders, and stretches further downward every week. Concerned that her mullet might have… Continue Reading →

« Older posts

© 2024 Home — Powered by WordPress

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑